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May

Finance Friday Fortnight

By Scribbleboy 0 Comments

Categories: Life List and Money

Deskscape was late by 11 days, I’m writing about last week this week and this post is either one week or one day late depending on which half you read.

Tardy is the new punctual.

Week commencing 27th April (blogged on four occasions)

Incoming: £0

Outgoing:

£27 food
£19 rounding error

Total: £31

End of Week Total: -£3,576

The week above is a perfect example why Finance Friday is so tedious. I have to try and add and then you have to read it. The week below is probably the most interesting week so far.

Week commencing 4th May (one measly post)

Incoming:

£190 Thorntons

That’s right I got paid for the work I did over Easter and not only that but with the most ridiculously oversized payslip I’ve ever seen.

thorntons_payment

Also £500 worth of Premium Bonds cashed which means I’ll now be able to pay my rent (turns out the cheque bounced because it had been damaged rather than there not being enough money in there, so no additional charges for me, yay).

So £190 plus £500 is (all together now) £690. It was great, for half a morning my bank account was in the black, then I paid Clara and Gingell and I was back in the more familiar red territory.

Outgoing:

£37 food
£20 drink
£2 toiletries (I bought mint and tea tree flavoured shower gel, don’t get too excited)
£4 stationery (envelopes and stamps)
£4 entertainment (I bought a magazine, then I wrote about it here)
£18 Vodafone
£72 Council Tax (a council so corrupt they arrested the mayor, glad my money isn’t being wasted)
£50 Utilities

Total: £207

End of Week Total: -£3,161

Hopefully next week Finance Friday will be more punctual. Will also post about my one day of work, Brummie Chinatown, sitting in for Totem Films at a meeting and any Summer Ball escapades that take place tonight.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t,

Scribs

May

An April of Apples

By Scribbleboy 0 Comments

Categories: Apples, Life List and Money

apple_april

Last month I only ate 11 apples which, when you’re challenged to eat one apple for each day of a a month, is something of a failure. Based on the graphic above you’ve probably figured out that this month I was more successful. Here’s what I learnt.

Sometimes apples are watery pap, sometimes it’s like biting into a lemon, most of the time they’re just apples. Unlike money orgasms double gin something wholesome, the experience doesn’t get any better depending on the number of apples you have, in fact it gets worse.

After seven apples in a day (I had to play catch up towards the end of the month) you want to eat and yet the swirling of seven apples worth of acidic mush inside you suggests that this would be a bad idea. This explains why it was one third of the ACT diet (apples, coffee, tobacco) that MGM Studios prescribed Judy Garland (can’t seem to find an online reference to this but swear it’s true. Either that or I’m imagining dieting facts about Judy Garland, and that would be quite probably the gayest thing I’ve ever done).

On a more positive note I have successfully completed another challenge and am the first person in recorded history to actually have my five a day.

In other news, Finance Friday.

Week commencing 20th April (blogged but thrice)

Incoming: £0

Outgoing:

£27 food
£10 drink

Total: £37

End of Week Total: -£3,565

Phone bill and student loan repayment haven’t direct debited themselves which suggests someone somewhere has screwed up. Thorntons haven’t paid me and NS&I are dragging their tails over cashing my bonds which means my rent cheque bounced. Oh joy.

PS. Going to roll out my set of challenge icons next week, so if you’ve got any opinions on what you’ve seen so far let me know.

Apr

Will Work For Money

By Scribbleboy 0 Comments

Categories: Life, Life List and Money

When Graydon Carter said, “Those who can’t teach, write. Those who can’t write, write about themselves.” it was not only a cruel indictment of this very blog but also of what I’ve been doing for the past two days. Here’s what I wrote about myself;

I have a Higher Education Certificate in Creative Writing and Journalism having completed the first year of an NCTJ accredited degree at Staffordshire University. I have real life experience working on a hectic news desk and in a variety of office environments. These experiences alongside the work I have done in both hospitality and retail mean I have excellent communication skills, can work quickly and efficiently and am also adept at dealing with the public.

I am currently looking for a Birmingham based job in either media or retail. I am well experienced in both fields and enjoy working with the public. I am quick to adapt to different situations, enjoy a variety of tasks, work well under pressure and have a good sense of humour.

I currently work as a freelance writer with Totem Films, a media production company. I write extensively researched emails to persuade companies to commission promotional films with Totem. I would like to develop the office experience this position has given me by taking a job that has a greater variety of tasks and involves more human interaction.

If you’re a regular reader of this blog you’re probably more familiar with my employment history than you’d care to be, and with my three day stint at Thornton’s out of the way (it’s not that I was bad, they just needed some temporary support for Easter) I am once again in search of employment (yes, I write emails for Totem Films but I’m looking for something in Birmingham that is not solely commission based).

The above description was written for reed.co.uk. You can also read it on the jobs section of The Sentinel (in case you want to hire me while I’m still in Stoke) and my LinkedIn profile.

Over the next few weeks I will update this post as I join more agencies, sign up to new websites, hand out CVs and fill out application forms. I promise not to bore you with any further posts about job hunting, unless I get an interview, in which I plan to bore you to tears.

If by some twist of fate you want to hire me click here.

Apr

Issues of Fragmentation

By Scribbleboy 0 Comments

Categories: Life, Life List and Money

This week I have been watching a lot of The West Wing and Invader Zim, which represents a problem (and it’s not my lack of productivity, although that is an issue). My tastes are somewhat varied and my blog posts even more so. Guessing what you people like is almost impossible.

For example, my friend Ally has started a blog called Wheels on Fire about his quest to wheelchair race in the Paralympics and while I hope that my audience wouldn’t advocate sport, I’m sure there’s a few of you out there that do. Am adding it to my links page and will be keeping a close eye on it, should be quite inspirational and entertaining when he’s starts putting some posts up there.

Shocking as it may sound however I’ve done more than just watch tv and read other people’s blog. I went on a 5km run with my housemate Gingell and even travelled to Stafford to present Totem Films with their belated Easter egg (photographic evidence pending).

It was the day before the dissertation deadline in Stafford and Frosty thought everyone would be out partying (see I have some non-lazy friends) but instead they were all at home, writing their dissertations. Deciding that Love2Love (£10 all you can drink) would be dead we went across the road to Casa (five bottles for £5), and while the night was lousy the company was good, here’s a picture.

L-R: Zofiah, Damian, Frosty and Guy

All this however is a mere sideshow. The reason you read this blog is to feel better about your bank account and so, without further ado, I present another Finance Friday.

Week commencing 13th April (blogged five times)

Incoming: £0

Outgoing:

£23 food
£15 drink
£4 Entertainment (I bought Love All the People by Bill Hicks. Hicks’ material was always harsh but to see it in printed form gives it an extra edge. This book makes me realise how much we need someone like Bill with us today)
£24 presents
£30 utilities
£15 insurance monthly direct debit
£10 additional (have decided to start calling this category “rounding error”, it sounds marginally less incompetent)

Total: £121

End of Week Total: -£3,528 (I don’t even know anymore, feel free to come and audit me)

PS. The title of this post is courtesy of Gingell, you should take a look at her blog Running from Zombies.

Apr

Backdated For Your Pleasure

By Scribbleboy 1 Comment

Categories: Life List and Money

Finance Friday, posted on Saturday. I bet you’ve worn your F5 key to dust in anticipation. It’s alright, my monetary incompetence has now been fully documented for yet another week.

Week commencing 6th April (blogged five times)

Incoming: While the fabled Lloyds TSB account turned out not to exist, the Chelsea account was very much real. This week, with the help of my mother, it managed to close itself down. This means I now have only two bank accounts and, if I can jump myself out of this last overdraft, Finance Friday will become a monthly instead of weekly event.

£117 Chelsea account

Two weeks ago my Gran sent me £5 to call her. This week, having not called her, she sent me another £25. Logic would suggest that if I wait another two weeks she will send me £125 but somehow I doubt it’s that simple.

£25 Gran

Total: £142

Outgoing:

£38 food
£3 entertainment – I bought Mark Ronson’s Version in HMV. A lot of people, most notably Front Magazine (warning: If you’re offended by nudity… remove all the mirrors from your bathroom, immediately), hate Ronson but even if you recognise that he is a personality failure, most definitely not a style icon and overuses horns you still have to admit he is good at what he does
£6 clothes (I purchased two black shirts from the Primark Essentials range for my time at Thorntons, all about the labels)
£23 additional (As recognised by this blog post and the book The Secret Dreamworld of a Shopaholic I need to make a note everytime I spend money)
£4 to the money-grubbers at Nationwide. (I still don’t know why, we discussed this before)

Total: £74

End of Week Total: -£3,407 (Last week’s End of Week Total was waaaay off due to my mathematical inability)

When your two greatest outings for the week have been Sainsbury’s in Stoke and The Potteries Shopping Centre in Hanley it’s rather difficult to find a universal truth to accompany your finances. Here instead is some chav wisdom (an oxymoron if ever you heard one).

chav_wisdom

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About

Born in Paignton, somewhat educated in Stoke-on-Trent and living in Peterborough. I am a footsoldier in the army of the unemployed and an occasional blogger. I spend my days applying for jobs and watching Glee.

I survive on caffeine, willpower and savings alone. This blog is a record of my successes and failures as I try and complete life-improving challenges suggested to me by readers.